Best Baseball Parent Advice

Twenty-five plus years in and around youth sports has taught me a lot of lessons. Some lessons along the way were harder to swallow than others. Like the one about being the Head Coach and the perception that you know everything just because you’re the Head Coach (spoiler, you don’t). Or that if you played pro sports (or at the college level), that makes you an elite coach (spoiler, again, it doesn’t). But one thing I did take away from all this time in youth sports, is how to parent while the journey is happening.

I was recently asked the question “What is the best piece of “baseball parent” advice given or learned to or by me over the last two decades?” I spent some time in reflection. All that I learned traveling the youth sports journey, and all that was passed along to me by others who traveled this road before and with me. I’d like to share it now if I could. Unbiased and without a kid in the game at the moment. My attempt to help the games I love so much.

When your son/daughter is right around the 13/14 age and moved on to the adult sized field of play – as a parent, it’s your time to move on as well.

You know that famous meme of Homer Simpson backing into the hedges as one thing and re-appearing as another? That’s what I’m talking about when I say you should be moving on. It is at that time that you begin the transition from we are doing this together to you are doing this for you. It’s your son’s baseball journey and future career and not yours. Give him the keys to start the engine, let them put the car in drive and go. He will either get after it himself or he won’t – and if he doesn’t, then that’s ok too. It wasn’t a trip he was meant to be on.

Please be careful what you post online, because coaches are reading it and it could affect their future recruitment.

There are lots of “that parent” beating their chests in youth sports. I get it. I’ve made mistakes as a coach I wish I could do over that warranted critique. I’m human, we’re human. It’s fine to share criticism with family and friends. If you have to (and I’m not saying you do or should), critique in the private inner circle that you trust. But please, your son is begging you, don’t post things that will probably paint you as something you’re not which could later embarrass your child and possibly make suitors shy away from a player with parent baggage. I promise – If two players are equal, the coach will choose the one without the baggage. Don’t be that baggage.

Grab your pompoms and root FOR your player, not AGAINST everyone else.

Taking a step back and empowering a young athlete to navigate their course can be, like me, a hard pill to swallow. Letting them do the driving doesn’t mean don’t support your player. This doesn’t mean to totally divest. You still have a role as a new cheerleader and as a parent. Still be mindful, vet out situations and instruction and be there for support when times get tough. The higher they go, the tougher it gets. But, do it tactfully and as your new role dictates: As a supporter and from the stands.

Celebrate your new teenager by cutting the baseball parent cord and let them blaze a trail. Stop pushing, stop pulling strings, stop coaching from the sidelines. Join the rest of us who have come to grips with the fact that whatever they do – positive or negative on the field – is zero reflection on your parenting. So celebrate you too – by embracing your new role. It’s his journey, not yours.